The Land of Kinelthen

Coming Up From Behind

Like REAL heroes

When confronted with an absolutely metric fuckton of giants camped outside a fortified city what is a group of adventurers to do? According to Calla summon a bunch of celestial badgers and tunnel your way under or disguise two of your party as giants and have them saunter on in, never-mind that paladins cannot bluff. DETAILS! If you’re Moffat you disguise everyone as a wagon load of firewood or make a giant sculpture of a badger and wait for them to take it in.

Turns out none of these plans are very good when Aaramon the ranger goes in to recon and discovers that no one actually goes in or out of the city and that the ONLY gate is guarded by weird harpies. And the badgers are not necessary as there are already tunnels under the city. Defying gravity is a simple matter now and some hugging and fly spells gets everyone down into the tunnels safely.

The first one was occupied by Longtooth the red dragon who’d helped raid the city of Riverpoint. Sure the group could have gone in there swords blazing (in Morgan’s case literally though it would require activating her divine bond :P) but the dragon was not their main goal. And so they did some fast talking and added some coin and items to the dragon’s horde in exchange for information.

1) The big tower/gate is actually not related to the giants, they avoid it as monk harpies live there with a ‘ancient evil’ inside. Noted and will be dealt with at some point, but again not the party’s main objective.

2)The other tunnel comes up inside the city, there are badass spider thing and Cayden knows whatelse in side but it might be the group’s best chance to get in.

3) Mockmorian is usually not inside the city persay, but is in The Pit (where the library is) and there is some kind of Black Cauldron thing down there with him which will need to be dealt with after his death and avoided like the probably literal plague while he’s still breathing.

He was even nice enough to help the group make a map which was a bit more detailed than the surprisingly good one that Aaramon made after his recon.

Will the heroes honor their bargain with the dragon in the long term? Will Longtooth keep his end and stay in the cave? Who knows?

Onward to cave Number Two!

Ick spiders are actually super ick undead spiders, the group remembers that they have a necklace of fireballs at their disposal and lob some in weakening them and almost doing away with the swarm of little buggers around the big guys. In the end only Moffat feels the effect of their poison and none fall to the cave dwellers.

Next came perhaps the longest shittiest combat in group history. Turns out DR is a huge Achilles heel for Aaramon who pumps out a ton of damage in little bursts. After HOURS of hacking and slashing, a nap, a puppet show, and an insult war which had no true victor the Red Caps (who knows WHY they were there, Dungeons don’t NEED reasons!) were finally defeated and the group took a much needed rest in Galdor’s RopeTrick Castle (a pick up line he has not fully exploited).

The next day of exploration had the group coming up upon the world’s most oblivious barbarian kobold. Attempts at diplomacy only earned the rather rude “DIE DIE DIE” response and they were forced to do battle. When it was clear she was getting her ass beat down she dropped a necklace of fireballs and ran, but the group is too smart for this and Galdor cast fire resistance on Morgan who scooped up the necklace ensuring that nuke never went off.

Going off in pursuit of the barbarian found the group facing not only the little dragonthing, but also giants and ogres as well. Looks like the ogres were making leather armor for the giants and they ate it pretty hard as Morgan discovered the joy of lobbing bits of fire into packed groups. There was also a group of shaved and unhappy dwarves at the back.

And that’s a wrap! To be continued! Maybe with a dwarf update in the near future.

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LordCerigo LostPixie

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